Day 38. Feelings

Have you ever have feelings from someone? Did you ever tell that person about it

Yes, I have. Yes I did. And I don't regret it. Even though it made me hurt because the person didn't love me back, I am proud to myself. I can clarify about this: being someone who confessed doesn't make you more inferior.


After I finished George's Secret Key to Universe, today, I procrastinated my work with reading Persepolis all whole day. I found illegal copy of it. I rate this book 4/5.

This book is a feminism graphic novel and the story of this book is based on the experience of the illustrator and the writer of this book, Marjane Satrapi. She is an Iranian who grew up in Islamic regime and war state with Iraq. Their parents raise her to be a woman with freedom. This book is about her life between 12-24 years old.

I learn a lot from this book. I learn about Iran from 1980-1994. I learn about the culture of Iran. I learn about the political condition in Iran. I learn about how greedy Saddam Husein was, he wanted to dominate Arab countries for...oil of course. "as long as the oil is still there, we will always at war" which is true. I learn that in Iran, they are forced to wear veil in public and behave like a good muslim. Iran established Sharia, the religion law governing muslim. Marjane didn't get her freedom because of this. She and her families believe with one God, same as other muslim, but they don't practice it. This book is also talk about the right of women which is died there.

I am a muslim myself and I think I understand Marjane situation. I believe that being spiritual is the right for anyone and no one cannot force anyone to behave in a particular way. From this book, I learn that doing that doesn't work at all. People will be rebelled for freedom. I am glad I live in Indonesia. We try our best (we as the people who are not ignorance of course) to be tolerance to other people who are different because we are very diversed country. We don't force women to use veil for their heads. I am proud that the equality of the rights is much better than arab countries like having the same jobs like men, having higher education, the right for divorcing men, etc.

Here is the list of my favorite quotes from this book:

Marjane's conclusion after all:
Once again, I arrived at my usual conclusion: One must educate one self.

Marjane's grandma wise advice:
In life you'll meet a lot of jerks. If they hurt you, tell yourself that it's because they're stupid. That will help keep you from reacting to their cruelty. Because there is nothing worse than bitterness and vengeance. Always keep your dignity and be true to yourself.

In the end, reading this book encourages me to read more books. I feel that this activity is not wasting time. I learn something and it makes me think.
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Day 37.Upside Down Drawing

Find a picture online or magazine that would like to do an upside down drawing on this page.

After I procrastinate this challenge, finally I am drawing something simple. I doodled a girl, my favorite object.

It feels weird, obviously. She should wear a dress, but I drew it like she wears coat. The hair has big volume too. It's weird experience. But it turns out nice, I think.

Day 36. Picture That!

Go outside and randomly take five pictures of anything around you. Write about those pictures you took.

Okay, I went outside!
Welcome to my campus, where I've been spending my time for 3 years, where I studied and work.

This is the center of the campus. Under the circle is information center. This is my style of taking picture, near with the leaves. And in this picture, I took the picture near with a pine tree.

This is the street. Look, so many motorcycles here...THERE IS a parking area for motorcycle but the capacity is full usually, so, some people use this area.

This is Coversion Electric Energy laboratorium, the hardest laboratorium to find it. So old.

This is my lunch: rice, chicken liver, vegetable, and sweet tea.

After lunch, I found her. She is so pitiful, I want to give her food but I don't have anything... :(

This is the alley of the building of my workplace. It's built by stone and this is the uniqueness of my campus. It's already been there for 100 years maybe...

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Day 35. 5 minutes

Meditate or go to a quite place for 5 mins. Write about it afterwards.

It has been a while I am not doing meditation. After procrastinating by some days, cleaning my room sincerely for myself, I took this challenge again. I set the timer and meditated.

Because I didn't meditate for a long time, it was like my first time I did it. I can't focus to my breath. Or maybe the reason is because I have so many anxious things in my mind.

Meditation is like I sat on the floor and I drew a cyrcle around me to protect me. Then some ghost appeared and tried to poisoned me with their thought but everytime they came, I made them go outside from my cyrcle. The good thing is that I can see clearly who are the ghosts.

First, my side job: LPDP. I didn't progress at all. I felt guilty to my co-worker. I hope he gives me another time. I will do my best after I finish my main job. That's what I want.
Second, my main job: The business plan that I hate so much.
Third, my view of myself nowadays. How I couldn't have time to just sit, close my eyes and breath for 5 minutes. How it was so hard. How worse my anxiety was inside my mind. How screw up I am.
Four, my feeling about meditation. It was harder than before. I couldn't keep concentrating at all.
Five, my view of how I am living with the fear and anxiety. How I, again screw up myself.

It's really good experience. I don't regret at all. I am grateful that I can do this challenge. I will practice to meditate again everyday. It helps me, a lot.
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1st Wulan Awards 2016

(it seems fun to do something like this, let's do this Deea!)

Best 2016 album of this year...
Radiohead - A Moon Shaped Pool

Best discovered album of this year...
One Ok Rock - Zeitakubyō

Best 2016 song of this year...
Daydreaming by Radiohead

Best Discovered song of this year...
No Surprises by Radiohead

Best Discovered band of this year...

Best 2016 TV show of this year...
Nigeru Wa Haji Da Ga Yaku Ni Tatsu

Best Discovered TV Show of this year...
I'm Home

Best 2016 Anime of this year...
Boku Dake Da Inai Machi

Best Discovered Anime of this year...
Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

Best 2016 Movie of this year...

Best Discovered Movie of this year...

Best book of this year... Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder

Day 32. Rant

Rant about anything you want on this page.

Media is really successful to make people phobia about Islam. It's really irritating me, the ignorance people, the stupid people. They feel they are smarter and people who choose to follow this religion are stupid. They feel they know everything about Islam. I hate them. The people who grew up with the media nowadays are irritating me.

I don't believe that world has became so much uncomfortable to live nowadays. How I can have trips to Europe or any else countries from now? How can I enjoy the trips? Can I really enjoy it? They have no rights to tell someone go away from their country. Just because my religion. Just because the women wear hijab.

But, really? Can we really think about this? Don't you think it's weird? Something has been wrong all this time.

First, It's about the countries that was keeping terrorist.

15 years ago, it was 9-11 insident in US. The suspect is the organization called Al-Qaeda which was in Afganishtan. There is speculation about inside job too, you can believe it or not, it's up to you. But you should learn about this possibility. Then, just because they were the "victim", they had the rights to go to Afganishtan to finish this organization. Then, they finished off the organization and there are so much civil people became the victims of this "war". In Indonesia, the local tv station used Al-Jazair tv at that time for the news. It was really different how the western media provide the news. The victims were so much less that is told by western media.

After that, it was Iraq. Even though I know that Saddam Husein was evil. I don't understand why but again, US had the rights to finish the Saddam Husein's government. After that, they had the rights for oil in this country. The number of victims, again, was different with the numbers that western media showed. After the falling Saddam Husein's government, Iraq has never been healed. It's more messed up. Afganishtan too. In the end, US had the right for oil in those country.

Right now, it is ISIS in Syria. Not only US, but also Russia confront the war with ISIS. But this case is a little bit different. It's like ISIS is being kept to do bad things. Why ISIS is harder to finish off then?

Second, something is really off if you say that Islam teaches their follower the violence. The number of muslim are 1,5 billion. But, I think no muslim agrees with the terrorist action. We actually hate it very much because of them, we can't live peacefully. Terrorist doesn't have religion. They bombed in Libanon too, in Indonesia too which has the biggest number of muslim, in Arab Saudi too, near with the mosque, the tomb of our last prophet, Muhammad. If Islam is encouraging to do the violence, you should imagine how terrible would be in this world.

So, why the terrorist feels it's the right thing to do suicide bombing? I am pretty sure after reading the article that was written by ex-ISIS, they are manipulated by the leader of them. They follow that leader because that leader was related with the honorable ones. It's like the fans follow their idol blindedly. They do what the idol say. They feel it's the right thing to do. They also don't read much about Al-Quran, the holy book of Islam. They misinterpret many things about what Al-Quran said. There is no such things like suicide bombing will go to heaven at all.

There is no such thing like supporting violence in Islam. It's clearly said that if you kill the innocent person, no matter who is it, is like you kill the humanity. We can go to war if someone attack us. But if it's not, then you can't provoke the war itself.

If the followers do that, then the problem is in their selves, there is nothing wrong with the religion. It's like a Christian does robbery in supermarket or killing someone, or doing domestic violence to his wife, he never ask what is his religion but why if a Muslim does that, then you said "ah, yes, it's because Islam is violence religion".

So, I am not terrorist. The good muslim who properly read Al-Quran is not terrorist. Terrorist has no religion. That ISIS organization is of course terrorist. But the US government who went to war, they kill so many, so many people in Afganistan and Iraq is terrorist too. And don't forget what Israel government is doing until now, killing many, many, many Palestenian, the women, the kids. Even the Jewish wants them to stop. So, you have no right to treat us horribly and discriminate us.
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Day 31: Moved

Have you ever been moved to tears from a movie, book, song, poem you watched or read? Write about it.

Of course I have been... I cried for so many stories. However I will only list the stories that made me cry A LOT. Because If I also list the stories that made me moved, it would be too much, and I can't remember all of them.


The Grave of Fireflies (Animation Movie)

It's about two children who are the Japanese civil victim of world war. I cried because I saw the victims of war's life, how the life is unfair for them. It's really heart breaking to see them.

The Princess Momonoke (Animation Movie)
It's about the battle between human and nature. I cried because I saw how human is so selfish, stupid, and how in the end, after human ruin everything, the nature takes care of it.

Nausicaa and The Wind Valley (Animation Movie)
It's about, again, how human is so selfish, stupid, and loving war.

Devdas (India Movie)
Tragic love story, similar with Romeo and Juliet.

Veer and Zaara (India Movie)
Amazing love story of Indian and Pakistani. I think this is how true love is...

My Name Is Khan (India Movie)
It's about an autist who is discriminated in US because he is Moeslim. This is movie is heart breaking and inspiring.

Kal Ho Naa Ho (India Movie)
It's about angel love story to a woman who is full of problem.

Asoka (India Movie)
Based on the history of India, the live of a love-war king of India named Asoka who had lived so tragic.

Bajrangi Bhaijaan (India Movie)
It's about a mute little girl who get lost and is saved by an innocent adult named Bhaijaan. It's really good story of peace and humanity, I recommend this, Deea.

3 Idiots (India Movie)
I laughed when they laugh, I was happy when they are happy, I was inspired when the 2 idiots are inspired, I was sad when they are sad, and I was cried when they are cried. It's mostly related with my problem.

No Body Knows (J-Movie)
The unbelievable cruel story about the kids and their mom. How could this happen in real life (the story based on reality)?

Grandpa's Love (Taiwan Movie)
Tragic story about the unfair love of grandpa to their grandchildren. I remember, this movie was so often aired on TV when I was elementary and middle school. And this was my first movie that made me cry a lot, if my memory serves right.

Miracle of Cell No. 7 (Korea Movie)
It's story about a mentally handicapped dad who loves his daughter very much, is falsely accused of a crime and sent to prison.

Titanic (Western Movie)
Of course the time when Jack sacrifies his life to save Rose and when the old Rose who meets her time to finally meet Jack after dozen of years...

Romeo + Juliet (Western Movie)
It's about tragic love story which in the end they are kill themselves.

Me Before You (Western Movie)

The Lake House (Western Movie)

Habibie & Ainun (Indonesia Movie, finally!!)


Endless Love (K-Drama)

I am Sorry I Love You (K-Drama)

1 Litre of Tears (J-Drama)

Mother (J-Drama)

Women (J-Drama)


Harry Potter 6
Of course it's because of Snape. Who else? T__T

Bokura Ga Ita (Manga)



Nandemonai Yo - RADWIMPS

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Day 30. Future

Write about the future. What do you think will the technology, houses, etc would be like in the future?

I don't like talking about the future actually. It's too scary. I am a pessimistic person. And I know that the world is worse and worse everyday. However, I will write the only positive things for now.

The technology will be more advanced. Google or Microsoft or other big companies will launch the phone which is like a paper. It's elastic. The augmented reality will become more common to be used for tourism. Like when we shot a mountain, or the building, it will give us information about them. The virtual reality will be used more often for education. The internet for poor country will be more faster. In every home, we will have smart television. It can be used for communication too, not only for watching. The bio energy cars and motorcycles will be invented more. I think house will remain same, but more people use apartment, not land anymore.